2022 Year in review

 1. What did you do in 2022 that you'd never done before?

 Get furloughed...I guess.

2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

 I don't think I've made a new year's resolutions since...??

3.  Did anyone close to you give birth?

 If so, they aren't coming to mind at the moment.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

 As I write this, my aunt (My grandmother's sister) passed last week.

5.  What countries did you visit?

 Just my room. 

6.  What would you like to have in 2023 that you lacked in 2022?

 If you read previous "year in reviews", take a guess...

7. What dates from 2022 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

July 27th, my kid sister's wedding, which I couldn't attend.  March 14th, the passing of childhood hero Scott Hall aka Razor Ramon

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

 I met scream queen Linnea Quigley. Check that off my bucket list.

9. What was your biggest failure?

 Not finding my own place, especially when space was needed, driving me to a deep depression.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Co-vid, vaccines and constant back problems.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

 um, a new razor? Manga?

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

...💆

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

I'm sure someone's did...

14. Where did most of your money go?

Groceries and Chinese food, probably

15.  What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Seeing friends who I had not seen in quite some time.

16.  What song will always remind you of 2022?

... 🙎

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

 -Happier or sadder: Quite sadder.

-thinner or fatter: fluctuating

-Richer or poorer: I have money but it's all going towards one thing. 

18.  What do you wish you'd done more of?

 Where do I start?? 

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

 Crying

20.  How was your Christmas spent?

This is being written the first week of December. 

21.   Did you fall in love in 2022?

Like every year, I fall in love all the time. 

22. Did your heart break in 2022?

Comes with falling in love all the time. 

23. What was your favorite TV program?

Warrior but given that show was released a couple of years ago, can't really call it new.

24.  Did you know anybody who got married?

My kid sister. I couldn't make it due to guilt. 

25. What states did you visit in 2022?

Just the one I live in.

26.  Where were you when 2022 began?

At home, probably...

27. Who were you with?

myself, probably...

28.  Where were you when 2022 ended? 

This is being written the second week of December.

29. Who were you with when 2022 ended?

See previous question and its answer. 

30. What was the best book you read?

...Akira Toriyama's Manga theater? Booty Royale (don't ask!)?

31.  What was your greatest musical discovery?

Nothing new

32. What did you want and get?

When I get it, I'll let you know...

33.  What did you want and not get?

Too much to list. Still don't have my own place or a PS4...

34. What was your favorite film of this year?

Wakanda Forever

35. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

Went grocery shopping at the Asian supermarket and ate Chinese food the day of. The next day, I reconnected with an old friend and met one of her twin sons. I turned 40

36. Where did you go on vacation?

Out of my room.

37. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2022?

Jeans or Longjohns

38.  What kept you sane?

This year, with everything that's happened, I really don't know

39. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

um...

40. What political issue stirred you the most?

Well, when one of your favorite artist becomes antisemitic and one of your favorite comedians becomes homophobic and transphobic, it's a tad awkward.

41. Did you have to go to the hospital?

For check ups, mostly

42. How many concerts did you see in 2022?

None

43. Did you have a favorite concert in 2022?

No

44. Who were the best new people you met?

Gabriel and Gideon, my friends twin toddlers.

45. Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?

Besides the mental breakdown I had in late August, I missed my kid sister's wedding because I missed my big sister's wedding. I feel bad for missing both.

46. What was your most embarrassing moment of 2022?

The mental breakdown or me waiting almost 3 hours for friend for lunch (the friend was late due to no fault of their own). I just felt like a goof sitting in a restaurant that long. 

47. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2022?

From last year: "It's a bit different than what we imagined but don't worry, the future isn't set in stone. No one's is..." 

48. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

"...Raise your downcast face and look at the sky

give me peace, in my hands, starting over

smile & smile, on a shooting star, you're a shining angel

heart and heart, at this moment..." 

"Smile & Smile" by Aura

Rest in Peace, Aunt Tiny, Kevin Conroy, Jason David Frank and DJ Twitch

Freethought your mind 2: Geek 2 Geek

 Oy vey, how do I keep getting involved with self-destructive social groups? 

Ages ago, I wrote an entry about the highs and lows of being part of nonreligious college group. Well, this time, at least religion wasn't involved. 

As a fan of bad movies and riffing (think Mystery Science Theater 3000), I fell in with an online riffing group I'll just call "Jokes n' Java. I discovered via online personality The Cinema Snob. When I first began attending their events, it took time to get noticed due to being in such a crowded environment. I tried putting out things that would come off as odd (I let it be known that I'm black and liked riffing) but I just learned to point out something humorous about the bad movie go from there. Through time, I began seeing myself the "straight man" of the group. Whenever someone said something EXTREMELY off color, I would be the "really, guys?"...guy. Not sure if I'm correctly describing a straight man in comedy.

It was fun to being a part of the community, finding people who shared a likeness in interests (even found some of the members are fans of tokusatsu) and interacting with some of them outside of the website JnJ was on. Through time, known online personalities joined and the site became bigger, but a few things happened that led to what felt like a odd change in the group. 

1. One of the founders, I'll just call him guy 1, left the group. They were dealing with their lives and it led to one of the few good things to come from the group, the saying that "Real life comes first". This is absolutely correct when it comes to anything online. 

2. Guy B became solely in charge of JnJ and while I originally had no qualms with him, it felt like he began changing. He came up with another motto, "agree to disagree". I'm sure he didn't actually say that but still. I don't knock this because there have been several disagreements between group member, myself included, so I guess he saw that tensions were running within the group.

The 3rd thing, however... this will take a moment. Well, CTC happened. If you are curious of what that is, let's just call it... a clusterfuck. A LARGE group of content creators vented about their time at a larger internet base they were affiliated with. Well, Guy B was ever so slightly connected to the event, via Cinema Snob, who stuck with site. It felt like  Guy B made it his life's duty to shit on those who left. Do I believe that there were some exaggerations? One or two BUT I am also of the belief of "where there's smoke..." . 

Movie riffs would stop suddenly for him to just vent about how soft those affected by CTC were. Sadly, he had a LOT of people that agreed with him and soon JnJ went from "agree to disagree" to "agree to disagree...unless you disagree with me. Then, you're a...". I slowly became disillusioned and began not attending as much. On top of this, I felt a little left out when I contributed quite a bit.  I will admit that I was angry for this. I did the one thing I shouldn't have done, I made the group my life. Thankfully, I wasn't the only one. There was no uprising, we just didn't attend as much. 

I'm older and the drama going on was very childish and when someone I know feels threatened to the point to quit the internet with the drama being a factor (not the largest factor but still) and disappearing, it's time for me to just not be there anymore. I stayed friends with a few people who talked about how in shambles JnJ was. Guy B and another contributor had a HUGE falling out and that person went back to their own projects and Guy B is still running JnJ. He's got new fans now who hang on his every word and the old ones who stick by his side and I always want to ask them what keeps them doing the same. 

Maybe they got so involved, they did what I did and make it their lives.

Saw a star shining bright: a decade later

 A decade is a long time. In that timespan, there can many helloes and goodbyes and sometimes, goodbyes aren't fair. In this decade, so many have come and gone out of my life that some goodbyes are a blur and some just stick. March 17th of this year marks a  decade of Candace Johnson saying goodbye. She is one who stuck.

I've been writing this blog for about 10 years and our goodbye was one of the first entries.  I've written about the star I saw the night of her viewing, the words said about me from her parents and my thoughts of her. All the time passed and I can't believe a woman like her could like schlub like me. 

I'm sure I've talked about the details in previous blogs about how we met and our instantly hitting it off, the missed phone calls, etc... but in these passing years, I wonder if I would still hold up to her standards. 

These past few years, I'm not as optimistic as I was in our time together and I wonder if I would have become this way if she were here. You don't judge yourself by the people who have come in and out of your life but some, you just can't help but to. There ARE people I just know I would have been a better person if they had stayed. Some, I've pushed away and some who just left. Maybe I would've been better with her or maybe I would've just drug her down to my level. 

I'm rambling because I dunno what else to say except I miss you. 

Forever,

your 🐸👑